Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Preteen Trends: The Big Three

Being the parent of a preteen, and wanting them to make good choices, always comes down to how involved you are in their day to day lives and how aware you are of what they face everyday at school, in your neighborhood and on the internet.

I know I'm not breaking new ground when I say that, but as a person concerned about preteens, their lives, their faith and their future - I want you to be reminded any time I can do so.

Here are the Big 3 areas of concern right now that are hitting preteens hard everyday, even more than with teens in some cases. The peer pressure to be involved, experiment, join in and do some of these actions can be too much for a young mind to handle or say no to, so mom, dad, whomever...step in!

1. Sex
Sex amongst preteens is on the rise. Sad but true. Even with the latest statistics showing that teen pregnancies have taperred off a bit, sex amongst preteens is growing. Still very much experimental, and very much touch and feel, but like most curiosities..they continue. Girls are being asked for, and at times demanded to give oral sex to boys who hold a girl's popularity for ransome if they don't comply. Girls now, in some instances, have turned the table and use it as a way to become popular. A very sad trend. One that needs to be addressed. Take time to have that awkward talk with your daughter. You might be surprised that she was hoping the conversation would come about because she's scared and needs help!

2. Drugs
Drugs are also on the rise with the preteen culture. More and more kids are learning that over the counter drugs, drugs easily accessible at drug stores or in the home, can bring about the same hallucinogetic effect as the bigger and more expensive illegal drugs can.
Learning some of the street terms for these types of "highs" can help you spot a drug problem early, or even prevent one from happening. Cough Syrup is a biggie. Kids have learned that 900 milligrams of many cough medicines can make you high, so they swallow it fast. Names like roboshooting, robochugging, robo, rojo, candy, skittles, Vitamin D are just a few to listen for. I recommend you go on the internet and search terms like "Street Terms for Drug Use" or something along that line ( Teen Drug Slang: A Dictionary for Parents ) is an article I read online that CBSNews wrote with good information. Again, the communication with your preteen about why drugs seem so important to their friends, and what you can offer to replace a feeling of wanting to tune out will be huge.
3. Social Media
The internet is something that is not going away, so it needs to be turned into a positive tool. The growth of unseen people, groups, organizations and causes that want your preteens eyes and ears are bigger than ever. The stats on how much money and time companies are investing online just to turn your child's head is off the chart. The sad thing is, if you pound an a door long enough someone will answer it, and preteens are answering at an alarming rate. It also ties itself to the first two of the big three because sex and drug use are being viewed, learned and enhanced through websites set up to target young minds. This is one area where stepping in and monitoring is a must, even though it won't make you popular at the time. But, in my mind, the cause is too great to look the other way and just hope your preteen makes right choices. Questions to ask them: Why do you want a Myspace, Facebook, twitter, other account? Will I, as your parent, have total access to your accounts? If not, why not? Are you allowed to read there emails, their texts? Again, if not, why not at least needs to be asked? Trust me, at this point, there is no room for privacy when it comes to the internet. Set that rule now! Find other ways to give them a sense of privacy. A Diary you won't look at. A special place in the house all their own at times. Pick a time for them, and couple of friends, to go hangout somewhere by themselves. Be creative, but be firm!

Send your suggestion and ideas that have worked for you. We all need to work together on this! They need our help, now more than ever, whether they know it or not!

Keith Poletiek travels the nations speaking to preteens and leaders of preteens. He is an author, illustrator, comedian and storyteller and available to come speak to your students on issues of value, morality or just being the person God intended you to be.

http://www.keithpoletiek.com/
keith@keithpoletiek.com
http://www.project316.org/
Facebook: Keith Poletiek